PICK a Partner

How to Follow Your Heart Without Losing Your Mind

The PICK (Premarital, Interpersonal, Choices and Knowledge) a Partner program applies the RAM to singles’ romantic relationships. The program teaches two main points. First, how to pace the development of a relationship in a healthy way so that the love is blind syndrome is avoided. Second, the program teaches five areas to get to know about a partner that accurately predicts what they will be like in a long-term relationship. 

Program Versions

  • Military
  • Christian
  • Young Adult (5 & 10 lesson)
  • Spanish
  • Mandarin

Program Sessions

1: A Bird’s Eye View of Dating

This session presents an overview of the model of the dynamic, bonding processes involved in a growing relationship and how this model can be used for making a marital choice.

2: You Can’t Marry Jethro Without Gettin’ The Clampetts

In this session you will learn what you need to know about the hidden and often unexplored areas of your prospective partner

3: The Ingredients For The Recipe Of A Lasting Relationship

In this session you will learn what you need to know about the obvious but often overlooked areas of your prospective partner.

4: Why Is It That “Expectation Lead To Disappointments?”

In this session you will learn how a healthy trust can be developed from what you know about your prospective partner and how to grow in this trust and reliance while minimizing your vulnerabilities.

5: Putting The Cart Before The Horse

In this session you will discover the important role of committment and the protective sexual boundaries for the growing relationship with your prospective partner.


Who is the PICK Program designed for?

The PICK program is intended for all ages of singles, from middle school aged to those who are in their twilight years. To date, the PICK program has been used with numerous populations. It has been taught in middle schools, high schools, universities, non-profit organizations, domestic violence shelters, churches, and in all branches of the military. The PICK program is also translated into Spanish and Mandarin and has been used in Spanish speaking communities as well as in Singapore.  Love Thinks offers several different workbooks for the PICK course: military, young adult, 10-lesson young adult, and Christian. Feedback/research from participants as well as from instructors has supported the applicability of the PICK program with diverse populations including: Hispanics, Asians, low-income individuals, African Americans, and GLB individuals.

What are the PICK Workbooks?

The PICK workbooks are designed to be used either by individuals who are watching the PICK videos in a self-study format, or are part of a group being taught by a certified instructor. This workbook contains the outlines of the five sessions of the PICK Program, the graphics used in the videos and power point, many discussion and self-reflection questions, and the 99 questions to answer before marriage. They are forty-two pages long and come in one of two covers- the no-jerks logo or the love thinks logo. We have several versions of our workbook: C-PICK (Christian), young adult, 10-lesson young adult, Spanish, Mandarin, and military.

What are the C-PICK Workbooks?

The PICK Program is a non-religious curriculum that is used in many settings including educational, military, and social agencies. It is also taught in church settings. The C-PICK workbook contains the entire PICK workbook, but has an additional Bible study on each of the five sessions. These five Bible studies supplement the PICK curriculum and show the harmony between the PICK Program and Christian principles. Many certified instructors in churches use this workbook when they teach PICK.

What are the PICK videos?

The PICK Educational Program on video (DVD) is a live presentation by Dr. Van Epp- kind of like a standup- to a diversified audience of about 600. This was filmed in the spring of 2004. The five sessions of the PICK curriculum are presented in forty to fifty minute timeframes. These lively and humorous presentations follow the power point outlines that are also contained in the PICK workbook. The video can be purchased at the PICK Products page online and is suitable for all ages. It can be used by an individual as a self-study course, or by parents with their teens, or within a group setting. It is included in the Instructors Certification Packet and is used in part or whole by some instructors when they teach the PICK curriculum.

How do I become a certified instructor?

Certification can occur in one of two ways. First, Dr. Van Epp conducts live certification seminars that you can attend. These training seminars require the purchasing of the Instructor’s Certification Packet. The second way that you can become certified is by purchasing the Instructor’s Certification Packet (ICP) from the PICK Products page online. This packet includes a DVD live presentation of the instructor’s course. After viewing the DVD you must take an online test, and then you will be added to the certified instructors list. This list gives you access to the instructor’s section of this website where you can obtain discounts on the purchase of workbooks, download supplements to the PICK curriculum, enter into forums with other instructors and much more.

Is there research on the PICK Program?

Yes. A study on the PICK Program was conducted and published in a peer reviewed journal, you can find that here. Also, an overview of most of the PICK research was compiled in a downloadable book here. Also, please feel free to visit our research section to learn more.


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